Road Scholars
Road Scholars is a chatroom/ill-advised social experiment moderated by McKain (nominally), QueentakesRook, DanBuckley5 and Tkkttony. Update (Nov. 3, 2014) Short story - Road Scholars was merged with the chatroom "The" due to inactivity. Long story - As the active users are shifting towards game-based and private chat rooms. People who get placed into regular quiet rooms aren't getting drawn into conversations. Hence, the unfortunate cycle of less chatting leading to even less chatting. As a result, for the good of Kongregate as a whole, the admins need to remove quite a few of the least-used chat rooms and Road Scholars was in the category. Rest in peace, Road Scholars. You've brought laughter, tears and endless hours of entertainment in the past few years. You will forever live on in our memories. To anyone who wish to share their memories they have gathered in Road Scholars, please feel free to edit in your memories in the "Memories" section. This will be a great way to keep the Road Scholars experience alive. (Or at least remind us what we went through together.) - tkkttony Known Crimes Theft in the First Degree (Stealing the couch in the Gibson). Aiding and abetting Trolls. Conspiracy to steal all the moderators in Kong. Felony kidnapping of new Kong members. Obstruction of justice. Perverting the court of Justice. Failure to slow down in a school zone. Hiding a precious vase in an unknown room somewhere in Kongregate. The stoning of users that ask stupid questions. History The origins of Road Scholars are shrouded in the mists of time and obscurity. In its current incarnation, the room is in a black hole of leaderless-ness. Without a leader, the conversations (if they can be called such) spiral into oblivion, often darting from topic to topic like a scared rabbit. That's not much different from the way they progressed when the room had a leader, but it's more dramatic to say things like that if the room has no leader. Formerly, the room was run by McKain, a refugee/exile from League of Gamers, who assumed power in a (debatably) bloodless coup in the summer of 2008. Under his dominion, lawlessness, terror and rampant gay innuendo stalked the landscape, and the room was officially cast out of the League of Chatrooms. Once again, things aren't much different now. It's just run by Queen, and there's more fun when you can say that anarchy rules the day. This suits the room's regulars perfectly, as their caustic and misanthropic nature puts them largely at odds with the outside world, any incursion from which will likely be met with a combination of threats of violence, rapier wit and common-or-garden mockery. Technology Attempts have occasionally been made to drag Road Scholars kicking and screaming into the twenty-first century. Most notable were the forays into robotics by McKain and burnme, creating McAble (latterly iPal) and BurnBot. BurnBot has since been removed by its creator following a dispute over the inclusion in its vocabulary of a reference to a type of Chinese sailing vessel. iPal (think of a terminator, but not trying to kill you) was removed from the room when it's creator, McKain, left to join the leagues of Gibson. Under its monopoly, iPal offered the services of a calculator, reported when it had last seen a given user, and simulated the throws of dice. Occasionally, when a user asked iPal to perform the impossible (divide by zero, feel) it would order the others to stone said user, normally resulting in a slew of "*stones (insert username)*". Law Enforcement Of questionable efficacy. In the event of spamming or trolling, the promptest response is typically offered by Road Scholar regulars turning out with pitchforks and lit torches to remove the miscreant, or at least damage his self-esteem to the point that he begins to question the meaning of life itself. This typically results in a swift (or at least entertaining) resolution, without the need to involve Kongregate mods (pictured to the right). Unless the said troll or spammer gets eaten, in which case drastic measures need to be taken to ensure that no further mess happens. Room Culture Road Scholars are typically sarcastic, irreverent and disdainful of anything not directly beneficial to their own lives. Despite this attitude (or perhaps because of it), Scholars are typically welcoming to newcomers, providing they have an IQ greater than that of a glass of water. The conversation, inasmuch as it deserves the term, is driven by the twin influences of the Dada movement and mescaline, akin to a highly-intellectual professor of art, specialising in the works of the lesser-known pre-Raphaelites, after having had his drink spiked with cheap vodka. It may be the only room on Kongregate where the lesser works of Molière have been mentioned in the same breath as duct-taping unruly children to walls and dropping sailing boats onto Americans from a cargo plane. Most notable are the ritualistic tangents that the conversations often go on. They start out with a simple comment, building and building until you have a conversation so abstract that to try and find where it began would drive one utterly insane. Road Scholars Mascot Although Road Scholars does not have an official mascot many of its denizens consider the platypus to be an animal that they can identify with. Like most Road Scholar the platypus, or Ornithorhynchus anatinus, ''possesses a wide variety of different traits it also possesses a venom that is almost as deadly as an experienced Scholar's sarcasm. Like some Scholars the platypus is semi-aquatic and hairy. Yet unlike 98.385% of Road Scholars the platypus is utterly adorable. Notable Scholars Given that most regulars will never amount to anything, it is highly suspect as to whether there is such a thing as a truly notable Road Scholar. Nonetheless, we offer the following examples (in no particular order), intended solely as cautionary tales: McKain Acting Ban Dispenser, 2nd Class. Lost Room ownership in June to Queen. Also known as McAFKain as he is often AFK. Could be easily exploited via his deep-seated (and bordering on the pathological) love of upcoming game, Borderlands. He also successfully converted ChaoticCrusade into a raving worshipper of Reese Roper. Now lives in Gibson PA's basement. IS NAO ALL GIBSON'S PA's! =D QueenTakesRook Fairly recently modded, as of going to press. Universally loved, except by trolls. Sham-hitched to PurpleAlex. BFF's with Joe_Shmoe The new room owner. Slighty stricked PurpleAlex He enjoys tearing people down until they have nothing to live for and then finishing them off by inviting them to a classy restaurant to share an expensive brunch. Of course, PurpleAlex does not pay. Newly sham-hitched to QueenTakesRook. Is a lovely person who hates everyone. He is drunk. Right now. CaraAdele Lives in France, where she spends most of her time trying to stop PurpleAlex from stealing her boyfriend. ChaoticCrusade The local evil genius bent on world domination, commonly called "CC" for short. Your typical self-entitled, self-absorbed, nerdy Scholar. Is known for ranting about D&D, Star Wars, Soul Calibur, and City of Villains. An all-around stand-up guy, albeit a gibbering Mac-fiend. As a side-note, he is often found cursing merlinseras for causing his newfound love-sickness. He is also an aspiring musician that enjoys making Heavy Metal versions of beloved dance classics, something that PurpleAlex wishes to murder him for. Knux Also known as Knuckles, Knux is a regular whose chief interests are grooming his oversized mane and evangelizing for Rise Against. With his quick wit and sharp mind, he's a very dangerous opponent at chess. Knux often worries about those close to him, but complains when people worry about him. Due to complications of real world proportions, Knux disappeared from a prior life in which he knew Zeneeba and Chazusama, which he constantly refers to, and only recently appeared in Road Scholars, swaggering like he had been in the wilderness for two years. He is often found calling people by nicknames that are not usually used by others, making him very memorable. kimital Princess of Road Scholars and all around sweet gal. She likes very long showers. Chazusama likes feeding her, although she's too cute to actually digest calories into anything but energy. Silviar Awesomeness personified. Talented at appearing in the room, seemingly from out of thin air. May be a ninja or mythical beast. Also known for drawing awesome pictures for all the Road Scholars, it is believed she may actually steal a part of her subject's soul in order to better draw them. She is also the mortal enemy of tweezers everywhere, as 90% of her injuries are tweezer-related. Bobrey456 Often disrupts the chat by yelling at people for not having pancake mix, it is said that he owns a soul of a 6 year old boy who once made fun of his hat. AntonymtheVamp Sufficiently egotistical enough to create a space on the wiki for himself, Antonym would rather you call Vamp if you're a friend, Antonym if you're an enemy. He's memorized a great deal of information, none of it useful to the current conversation. While he cannot draw, he is a weeaboo in every other aspect except his clothing. Placed himself under Silviar for a reason. merlinseras The jury is still out on his emo status. May or may not be a wizard or mage. Part falcon, part hot anime chick, and also a self acclaimed love-sick-semi-stalker. ChaoticCrusade blames him for his recent love-sickness. DarkAdrien Touchy 17-year-old regular. Non-alcoholic, virgin and square, male 5'7 110 pounds. Orientation: straight, although still dealing with confused emotions for PA. DrEed By his own admission, a lover of wombats (wombatophile? check this - ed.). Is on some manner of police database because of this. madpraxis I don't know how to describe him, and his profile is blank. So... well, he's definitely a regular. Yes, he shows up sometimes. Which is nice. Update: just found out he enjoys long evenings watching lemmings jumping over cliffs. Dionysus128 The Greek god of Honey, Revelry, Wine, and bad math jokes. All he wants is love so that he can then turn around and stab you in the back. The most moraliest correctest and smartest Road Scholar ever. =ElMicha= Lovely Norwegian. Nekkuma Does not wear pants. Draws comics for a living. Good ones mind you. Enjoys trolling spammers. Currently the acting Pope of Kongregate. Kyler_Skye Born in the wonderfulness of Canada, Kyler_Skye has attained the status of most loveable and craziest person to enter the room. No one knows how Kyler did it, and it will remain a mystery until the opposite is revealed. Often mistaken for a male, Kyler is known for being overly excited when people enter the room - Shown by numerous pounces on '''Everybody!' Kyler enjoys talking in third person and dying randomly. Kyler_Skye also enjoys blood and guts and the combination of Black and Lime Green. Secretly married to Knux - he seems to forget though... Alexisonfire123 Is a very mysterious one-of-a-kind guy, who may or may not talk much. Really depends on how he feels or what he may be playing...or being the YouTube fanatic he his. Watch out for his reference to Death Note, with it being his favorite show on the face of the earth...except for the fact it's over and he realized what happened. Usually will be on everyday unless he his lost under the mounds of homework from his AP classes. -.- KittyKatk8 A feisty Kat who needs a warning sign, but hasn't gotten around to making one. Loves making her own clothes and jewelry, as well as enjoying vegetarian and vegan food, also of her own making. Don't be fooled, though she is highly playful, she may at times be very dangerous. Additionally, she loves sweets, keep this in mind should you decide to anger her. Asking about her most recent project may also result in distraction from anger. MrResponsibility The new user for HELLKILLA, because the name was thought as "too immature for a 30 year old", MrResponsibility has recently had a baby with his wifee (Yes he calls her wifee). This has him out looking for another job, which is why he might not be on as much. :( He inhabits his mother's house, which he stole from her, after putting her into a "nice home" (Old people home). He lives there, and sometimes, his brother, who lives is also a major computer nerd, likes to stop by and play on his user. Also, if you haven't noticed, he likes to use commas. HOLY CRAP THERE'S A BABY NOW! Cj10203040 A life-long regular of the scholars chat. He is a budding gamer who is constantly trying to overtake McKain in levels (now succeeded). He is good friends with most users and gives and takes help on most games (normally gives). Now trying to persuade the admins to change his name to "Mr Cj". Also made the Road Scholars Idle, which Herty is wasting his life playing. GaminMadMan Not as usual a player as I used to be but I still go on it now and then, I have been a RS since the early times of McKain being a Mod and before he owned it. I am 15, Scottish and proud of it! I am an easy member to get along with, without too much trouble, I just come on here to have fun and chat. I tend to have 2 nicknames on here GMM and Gamin call me by either one. Triscuit113 The most self-serving member of RS, as he is writing this about himself. Known for often interjecting quotes from Firefly and other various media, it is apparent that he has devoted vast portions of his functioning mind to the memorization of USELESS CRAP. Either that or he is really good at exploiting Google and using CTRL+C and CTRL+V. He can often be riled into a discussion of religion and politics, and will vehemently defend his side until Kongregate shuts down. This is not advised, however, as it generally tends to alienate anyone who doesn't give a flying rhododendron's behind. Occasionally able to make a ROFL or LOL worthy witty jab. Also has the most unreliable internet connection EVER, which is why Triscuit is so unknown to all other RS. WalkingxSpazztic Spazz, also known as (Anna)rki, has been a Scholar for quite some time, though she is also well known in other rooms including the RP1 room and Lunatic Pandora. She has devoted her life to art and her ultimate ninja skills. Arguably she could also become a pretty good model, though her overly busy school year schedule prevents any sort of fun or career building to take place. She tends to stare in some way often at people who mention her, and when she has an opportunity to act, its impossible to predict what she will do. Her mind was, is, and will forever be, above human understanding. Mister_Andy Mister_Andy is yet another misanthropic regular to RS, although he's a relatively new one. He's often intolerant of stupidity, trolls, spam, and incorrect spelling/punctuation. He loves PurpleAlex, JeSuisOuefsFous, and Kyler_Skye, and hates DarkAdrian, who knows what he did... Mister Andy is often slow to accept newcomers, but is a fiercely loyal friend. Also, if anyone would like to add to this description, but leave the initial description unedited, Mister Andy would appreciate it. Probably. Cogwheel The quiet one, the resident nuisance, etc. Often around, but rarely talks, often saying he "Can't think of anything to say". He doesn't care in the least about badges and levels, which often results in playing a great deal of new, unbadged games. Cogwheel has a hopeless case of bookworm, and also seems to have a habit for playing games (and reading books) that no one has ever heard of. He also has an unfortunate reputation as the Japanese one, despite only living there, and is often PMed several questions a day relating to this. Not that he's bitter or anything. Note from KittyKatK8: He's not actually a nuisance, just says he is. ;P AoiScarlet An awesome regular. However always seems to be AFK. Aoi has fun toying with trolls and is Blazen's older sibling. Paradoxes Joined in '08 but wasn't very active until the beginning of '09, is friends with most of the regulars, and ended the Couch War. He has a slew of medical problems and hates Hospitals. Aniqa This 17 year old girl, whose name is often mistaken as "Aniga", frequents Road Scholars at random intervals. In fact her personality is as random as the times she is on the site. She often lurks and adds just a random comment to a dying conversation. She currently resides in the hot and humid hell that is Florida. She really likes octopi and platypuses and is planning to go to school next year to study biology. Wolfsbane93 Wolf is apparently “Part werewolf, part demon, part necromancer, 100% insane“ and hates spammers and trolls with a vengeance. She knows loads of people and is a friend/daemon master of Herty14, but would rather have a "sensible" chat with cogwheel and Mcmicker on the days that she doesn't quite feel like being eaten. She has many nicknames often that of "Wolfy" "Wolfers" "Fuzzball" and even "Devil Dog". How charming. Not that she's planning revenge or anything like that.Despite all of this hating stuff, wolf is actually a very nice person. Although she might kill me for saying that.... Unfortunately she hasn't been seen recently and with the rush of newbies she has a tendency to lurk around on the chat a lot.... The Hertys And you thought one was too many... Herty14 Origins unknown, Herty is an active regular with far too much time on his hands. Dedicated to the consumption of smaller, less resistant regulars, he occasionally floats about for a quick bite or another attempt at stealing Dan from Sinny. If not composing an eccentric symphony of some sort, Herty spends some... okay, ALL of his time on Road Scholars Idle, gathering about 40,000,000 million seconds just sitting there at his computer screen waiting for a special prize or something. Approach with caution. Hertyyy The other one. According to Zee, Hertyyy is roughly 22 times smaller than Herty and in fact robotic. More active, chatty, armed with an incentive to rant and a cookie cutter, he is one you want your sanity to keep outside a 3 mile radius of. Transient Scholars There are those Scholars who have moved on the pastures new, or have simply dropped from the face of the Earth; gone, but not forgotten. NEVAR FORGET. Slic3 Blue haired Virginia Tech student with an appetite for online games and small children. Also highly confused as to when he was actually added to the Wiki, because he took great pride in managing to avoid it. I mean seriously...SONUVABITCH! WHY?! WHO DID THIS TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!! groceryfiend Resident Nebraskan offended at not being on the wiki page. So panhead999 added him. Self described slacker. Brought to Nebraska in the back of a pick up truck as a young child. Baconbandit Just your average American whose passion is to steal bacon. Keep your bacon safe or you will never see it again. f15hfac3 Resident Australian, a reptile of the order Testudines, aquatic species having the trunk enclosed in a shell consisting of a dorsal carapace and a ventral plastron. Joe_Shmoe Joe_Shmoe is the self proclaimed Man Witch of Road Scholars. He has powers and dominion over hamburgers and the undead, as well as the almost dead and not quite so dead yet. He is openly gay and McKain's not so secret lover. He is BFFs with Queenie and texts her often. Terrenae Awesome bookish history-nerd. Not, in fact, the same person as Cara. Boredom_Man An excellent regular, but sub-par superhero. Has also succeeded in doing the horizontal monster mash and making a kid. Kudos. Ghostduckie Simultaneously the best and worst features of Road Scholars. He enjoys long walks on the beach, and eating bread crumbs. Danbuckley5 The other British one. Apparently not very interesting, since that's literally all I could think of when it came to describing him. But I just checked his profile; holy shit, level 50 odd?! A man with too much time on his hands. Also recently modded. One of the many who abandoned Road Scholars to live in Lunatic Pandora. Evil Dan. *He came back though. *{Still a traitor} TKKTTONY One of Road Scholars' moderators. Lives in China, also a British Citizen. Left Road Scholars when Room Ownership was passed down to QueentakesRook. Traitor. He then made his own room called 'Parkour Zombies'. And rarely visits Road Scholars. Other Scholars Not yet notable, but Scholars nonetheless. Warcraft21 War as we call him is an ex player of the actual World of Warcraft game who enjoys a chat once in awhile, can be trollish, one of the few Scots to be a Scholar. KlassyKat Thought to be a copycat of Kittykatk8, aka Kate, but she denies it every time she is asked. Which is every time she logs onto chat. She also is well known as someone who seldom goes on Kongregate and yet nevertheless says more than a 'Hello' or a 'Hi' or even possibly a '...' A scholar like any other... except for the fact she lives in a house of 5 cats, 1 parrot, and many fish, and loves to act like any of those animals. When nobody is around, of course. Akriloth Furry, bisexual, and doesn't care what you think about it. Also likes explosions. Capable of astral projection and teleportation. Personal Quote "Don't put in your mouth what you aren't prepared to swallow." Glemo Glemo or Glem as most people call HER (most people think this user is a guy she is not!) A very energetic user and also funny. There's never a dull moment when this user is arou Usually plays pr2 and like elements. Icegoddess A compulsivly bored phsycotich Nekomimi, bored out of her mind for the past 12 - 13 years... meh, time to blow up more of Venezuela. /Mercs2 *Also drop dead sexy. - Akriloth *Pyromaniac -Herself *Aspergers Syndrome -Her doctor *ADH-Hey lookit a butterflai - All of her friends and her doctor *Obsessive Compulsive disorder about the way her Comic sans isnt existing -Herself *Constant user of Trollscience - Her friends *Famous quote by her: "Some people just want to watch the world burn... and I'm no exception." keykan Key is a popular person in the chat, he likes his muffins and likes doing =] in the chat. And his rivals in the chat are Herty14, Cj, Dan and Tony, three of which seem to have disappeared. Including himself. blazen_angel That one guy, who has multiple accounts across all the room, is a professional room-hopper. Occasionally trolls any room at random due to random trivial first-world problems. That, or blazen has been on one too many roleplay rooms, Caution: Avoid at all costs. Jji04 recently joined road scholars and enjoys getting badges. On kongregate most days DrVoDkA A recent addition to Road Scholars. Mushyrulez Really stupid person, isn't even listed on this page without editing it! Nobody knows who he is... RIDDLESCHOOL! THE MOST AWESOME USER EVEA* Claims that he is king constantly, has multiple accounts. * Disputed by many all. pygy95 Just a troll, it has been banned and silenced many times, nothing seems to get through to it. Very dangerous, do not approach. Has multiple accounts, sometimes refered to as Ginny, as his name reminds everyone of a pig, and then, a Guinea pig. Is really a decent person. Dormas Found wandering in the room a while ago. Was frequently on to chat but recently has had few things to say other than Moo or other variants of cow speech, however if you peak his interest and he is not sucked into a game he will likely respond. MemoriesCategory:Deleted chat rooms This sub-section is for anyone who was a regular in the awesome Road Scholars chat room, and wish to contribute their best or worst memories. tkkttony My first ever room on Kongregate, how can I ever forget you? Getting Modded in this room on May 9th, 2009 was a highlight for me. But that was only one of the many entertaining experiences I've had in this chat room. If I had to list down all of the great experiences I've had, I'll flood this page. x) But yeah, it is sad to see this chat room go, it was great meeting you all back in 2008-2010. Anyways, I can be found in Cafe Kong The Village nowadays, if you wish to chat with me about Road Scholars, or just any other things. ^^ AoiScarlet Road Scholars was the first chatroom that I was tossed in when I first went onto Kongregate and created my account. I may have been mostly AFK (either badgewhoring or catching up on college work), but being able to log in and catch a few conversations here and there has been a part of my college life. This was like my home away from home away from home. Well, I graduated from college the same year that this room vanished, so it feels like being an active Road Scholar is pretty much me being a college student. It was great to chat with all of you from time to time, I'll be trying not to be as AFK as before... But it's a bit too late for that X3. I'll be wandering around the chatrooms of Kongregate now, see you around! Wolfsbane93 Ah good old Road Scholars, the first chat room I ever entered. I had some brilliant times on there like abusing Herty and annoying Tony and when I wasn't lurking in the background I was having a great time for several years. Unfortunately between college and work my time on RS decreased massively and it just hasn't been the same since my AWOL stage. I'll end up floating around the chat rooms I have no doubt, just lurking in the background ready to cause more mayhem...